A Love Hate Relationship

I had a very interesting experience today at the doctor's office.  It was kind of interesting timing but nonetheless a moment that I am grateful for.  I took Saige and Gage in for check ups and couldn't help but think of how big they are getting and how fast they are growing up.  It is during moments of reflection such as these that I am so grateful for my children.  I am grateful for the relationships that they have already established and I can say that I know that they knew they would be together in this life.  I am just so grateful that our Heavenly Father allowed us to be a part of these special children's lives.  As crazy and unpredictable as it is around here I would not trade it for anything!  

As many of you know, we have been having some real issues with Mason and his struggles lately. I love this little man more than words can say.  When having to deal with his struggles and trying to find out what the real problems are I cannot help but have some hate for his biological mother. I know that hate is a very strong and powerful word so please don't get me wrong.  I do not hate his mother.  Rather I hate her actions and the choices she made.  But yet on the other hand, had she not made these choices we would not have these little blessings in our lives.  

It is such an emotional roller coaster to have children that have been adopted and I think more so knowing their history.  It is so hard as a parent having to sit and watch your child and/or children suffer and struggle with simple things in life because of situations and circumstances that were beyond their control.  At times you feel completely helpless and all alone.  I am so grateful for Mason's Primary teacher.  She truly has been such an inspiration to me.  She is such a strong and beautiful woman who deals with what she has been handed so well.  I know that she must struggle daily and how emotional as well as physical it can be.  I am thankful for her help and her strength.